The New Years Resolution

Happy New Year!
So did everyone make your New Years Resolution last night? New Years Resolution, now that is a positive topic, or is it? I find it interesting that the majority of people out there will make at least one New Years Resolution, at least one. What I find even more interesting, yet not surprising, is that only about 10% of us actually feel we keep our resolutions. That’s right, only 10%!

I searched the web last night looking for articles on what the most popular resolutions are. Not surprising I found many of my past resolutions on the list; lose weight, exercise more, eat better, get a better job, save money, get organized, be less grumpy, stop smoking, stop drinking, travel more, and visit my parents more. I can honestly say that the only thing I have done on from my last 25 years of resolutions is travel more. 25 years of resolutions and I have taken two vacation trips! Not what I would call real successful. It makes me wonder why? Why can’t I hold myself to the resolutions I make for myself?

There was a study done in the UK on 3000 men and women. Of the 3000 men and women 52% of them felt very confident they could be successful with their goals. Hum…so even before the study really started, 48% of the participants in the study didn’t think they would actually be successful at working even one day at keeping their resolution.

So 48% weren’t confident from the start, but what about the other highly confident 52%. It may not surprise you to read that out of the highly confident men and women only 12% of them actually achieved their goal! Men reported a 22% success rate while women only 10%. (http://www.quirkology.com/UK/Experiment_resolution.shtml). I question why? Why is it that we can set goals for ourselves, but few of us will ever be successful at achieving these goals?

Let’s start this exploration by first looking at the work ‘resolution’. Webster Dictionary describes resolution as: the act of resolving, the act of analyzing a complex notion into simpler ones, the act of answering, the act of determining, the list of acts goes on. This is my first clue as to why I haven’t been successful at keeping any resolutions. The word ‘act’ has never been part of my resolutions! I haven’t analyzed or answered or determined or put into simpler form anything! I am starting to question how anyone would actually keep a resolution, but then I read this from Merriam-Webster Online Thesaurus. The synonyms for the word resolution are: Courage, Determination, and Decision. The description for the word was a “firm or unwavering adherence to one’s purpose”. That’s it! One’s Purpose! I know why I have been resolutionily (yes I know this isn’t a word, yet) challenged for so long, I have never stated a resolution that tied to my purpose! Whoa, positive learning here! So, what does that mean?

The first step in learning about one’s purpose is to start by understanding your personal values. A value is something that comes from within. It is what motivates you to be more. There are many ways to determine your values and one easy way is to start with a list of 100 values and carefully whittle it down to 3 or 4 that really describe you. I will attach a sheet I share with my life coaching clients as a starting spot, but it is in no way an exclusive list. I think it’s important to start with values as they describe your purpose, and if you can describe your purpose, then you can resolve to do and be anything.

For me, my values are giving, achieving and believing. I call it my GAB Matters. I hold them true and close to my heart. I find myself questioning things I do and always go back to the true question of “does ‘this’ fit into my values?” If the answer is yes, I continue and if it doesn’t I stop. I am my values and my values are me. What are your values? If you were to describe yourself in 3 or 4 words what would they be?

Many may ask where am I going with this post. First I am talking about resolutions and the next thing I have homework to do around my values. Well, it’s easy. I think many of us fail at our resolutions because many of our resolutions do not fit into our personal values. An example: I have always had a weight problem, well maybe not a problem, but the scale says I should lose some pounds. I have been on more diets and exercise programs then I can count on many hands and feet, but still I am overweight. I know it, I see it, I live it and you would think that sooner or later I would ‘resolve’ to change.

The problem is that healthy living is NOT one of my values. Not right now at least so I make statements of “I am going to get into shape” and “ I am going to look good by this summer” and my values say giving of yourself is important, achieving more is important, and believing in yourself and others is important. No where is being fit important. My point is that in order for a resolution to really work, it has to be part of your values. I want to talk more about this over this weekend as I think it is important, but I will close today’s post by saying: This Year I resolve to find a way every day to achieve a healthier life style. I will do this by setting small goals that can be measured weekly and be very specific about what actions I can take to achieve each goal! There, my New Years Resolution.

Sources:
resolution. (2009). In Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary. Retrieved December 31, 2009, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/resolution